Kids…

I don’t know if I’ve talked about my kids all that much.  I have 2 children and 3 step children.  My daughter is 24 and has 2 children.  Is engaged to be married (for the 2nd time) and buying and selling houses with her fiance.  She’s a stay at home mom.  My son is 21 and I can’t talk about him right now.  My oldest step daughter is 23 and she’s in a masters program in Texas.  The twins are 20 and 1 is in her junior year in college and the other is living at home with mom and working in HVAC which is what he got his tech school certificate in.

As I’m reading the above paragraph I’m like wow.  It doesn’t sound like much.  I’ve been struggling with my children’s choices and actions.  I mean I raised them and I feel  responsible for them, but am I responsible for their actions after a certain age? Do I need to feel like if one of them does something I wouldn’t do that it’s my fault? That I made an error in raising them? Then I thought why am I expected to be perfect and they’re not.  Then I thought is that a justification for my not having to take on their actions.  My mind and my heart are at war and I don’t know where to turn.

As I was thinking things over today I made myself feel a little better by acknowledging that while I did raise my children (as best as I could) that they are individual people.  They have their own hearts and minds.  They make their own decisions despite or because of what they were taught.  I can’t make their actions my own.  While that soothes my soul a little, I’m still no closer to deciding what I should do about my wayward child.

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